paws of my heart ..

stabbing jeers

2009-03-22T02:59:00.003+08:00

she is sitting on the sofa, contemplating everything you ever said. shes starring at the light that emits from her laptop monitor that lights up white, recalling about whatever thats happened... then it hits her, it hits her real hard. if only she knew how to speak up... if only she knew how to put it into words... the truth is that.... she lets her pride and insecurities control her head... the truth is that... her words and actions always contradict what she feels and what she really wanna show and say to you... the truth is that... she couldnt express her gratitude for every little thing that you do. the truth is that... youre one of the biggest reason behind her smiles... she is at war with herself each time the cold war begins.... cos she never knew how to end it even tho its making her feel f-ing terrible to treat you that way. youre someone who knew her inside out without her having to say a word, someone whos constantly trying to assure her that everythings gonna be okay each time something brings her down, someone who sees the frightness within her even without her saying a word. you always had something to say.....

i owed you apologies.
for all my unreasonableness, my selfishness and my stupid pride.

vals day 09

2009-02-14T00:23:00.000+08:00

im not in love... cos love is in me

was counting down the minutes,
was praying for a sign,
was trying to beat the odds...
and... there you were.

happy vals day <3

2009-02-09T17:26:00.002+08:00

dont drink your unhappiness away, run it...
cos those who run em away gets better in time.

我是坏人

2008-12-12T01:11:00.002+08:00

这不再是那种"只怪那一刻话说得太重，所有的情节都失控"的情形了.... 一切都不再相同，执着下去还有什么用? 拖拖拖究竟能拖到什么时候? 故事终究要有个结束，我骗不了你，更骗不了我自己，就当我是自私的... 让我狠狠的做一次真正的坏人吧。

2008-11-28T02:45:00.002+08:00

the news... mayb is nothing to you, but its something to me.
its only till im hyped up, that im willing to type sth out.

坏人

2008-11-25T00:51:00.006+08:00

"容忍的人其实并不笨，只是宁可对自己残忍。我是好人，也是个坏人。分得够狠你才有借口转身。。。宁愿爱一点不剩，也不忍看恋人爱成路人。"

在爱情的世界里，你想当一个坦白的坏人还是放手的好人? 当我们的爱情变得面目全非的时候，如果使坏能让事情变得圆满，我愿做个坏人。。。。吗? 原來假裝壞人就等於是好人因為不想看到彼此如此傷心度过，只好狠下心要求分開。原本是如此親密的愛人，一下子必需變成陌生人。。。要很不習慣用禮貌性的稱呼對方的名字而不再是曾經親密的匿稱。面對分離不簡單，寧願完全的忘了對方，忘了回忆。。。这样的话，也許再碰面時就可以很輕鬆的面對。

2008-11-22T04:42:00.002+08:00

something must have gotten a hold of me, else i doubt i will be saying what i was saying. maybe im just simply tired.. or maybe i had enough of all those moronic actions... maybe i had enough of all those dead words.. maybe maybe.. i just couldnt stop guessing what the hell i was thinking. i tried to be cool and put those words so blunt with a straight face i thought i wouldnt feel a twinge.. i must be out of my mind, and now i feel the prick. tell me what all these prove.

2008-11-18T06:54:00.004+08:00

counting down to the opening of an unforeseen brand new chapter....
final 3.5hours to go.

会难过，不知该说什么好。
i wonder if this is gonna do me any good at all.

hello, wind

2008-10-31T05:27:00.011+08:00

the wind was blowing from the west today and therefore...

MR. HALLOWEEN is here again...

that was last year...
so whats up this year?

we have FLOSSY to celeb the day tog with us,
so HAPPY HALLOWEEN :8

2008-10-22T04:38:00.002+08:00

视线都模糊了，就连透着窗外看夜晚的风景也让我的头开始有点晕。。。

2008-10-16T21:25:00.003+08:00

闷闷闷

2008-10-16T03:50:00.027+08:00

今天终于看了《狱中豪杰》这部电影。就像他们所说的一样，戏真的是还不赖。。。是个好笑又温馨的一部喜剧片。原来被关在监狱里也可以过得这么愉快。整个戏院都爆满了，只剩下最前排的那些空位。。。幸好我们有机会在电影播出前先偷换个位置，要不然真的要撑完整整一个半小时，脖子不酸才怪吧~ 但不知为什么，今天心里超不舒服，超闷，怪怪的。。。开心不起来就对了。回家也错不回家也错，上网也不知道该做什么好，不想这么早睡。。。就算现在让我闭着双眼躺在沙发上应该也会睡不着吧。。。再加上刚想到将要来临的那些考卷，心里更郁闷的。这次不知道又要等到考试当天的前几个小时才会怕到开始猛读。。。不知所措，最终还是选择在这个小小的博客帖子发牢骚。疯了~~~ 我觉得老天真的不再理我了。

*肥罗斯刚添了我的小指头又咬了我一下。。。哼~ 珍玲跟我说: "咬就等于爱嘛。。。它还没咬过我!"

one minute of silence

2008-10-08T01:14:00.001+08:00

i must admit that im deeply affected by the headline news today. this early morning itself i received an sms from bi which construed "Good bye MOS! ):" thought it was just a random crack... so i was told to check out yahoonews and damn damn damn......... tell me this is not happening! late last year itself rumours of MOS closing down have started brewing but it was proven to be fake... and just two hours back i read this news saying that "Lifebrandz Limited, which brought the popular club to Singapore in 2005, announced in a statement that it was ceasing MOS’ operations from October 6." so this is fcking happening for real!!!!!! refer to yahoonews for a more detailed info.

from being totally indifferent towards MOS to being so attached to MOS we used to patronize it at least twice a week without fail.. it has brought me countless tears and laughters and memorable moments i still treasure til now. guess things are simply moving towards the same route as i am dealing with things now. things are constantly changing, i take it as a blinking indication we should put the past behind and open a new era... i still love MOS and its SMOOVE no matter what! come back soon!!

flossydar

2008-10-05T05:36:00.006+08:00

been spending a lil more time with flossy recently but have yet to bathe her at all cos im afraid that she wouldnt b as furry as she is now. id love to have her slp next to me once shes had her litter training and her nails all trimmed and nice cos i dont wanna wake up in the morn with scratches all over my face cos ive alr had enuf all over my arms thanks to flossys dracula nails. im glad shes adapting to the hs and she alr knows where her lil home is. shes getting more and more attention and love frm all of us each day i hope shell b w us for a long long time. she brings smiles to my face (: anw i finally got introduced to fluffy, sissy and yiyi formally tonite. little that i imagined that id love bein ard em.. i liked sissy the most but i was told that i might put flossys life at risk by bringin her hm... so we brought fluffy(the supposedly more rabbit-friendly dog) back hm today for a short hs visit instead and flossy got terribly scared upon seeing her even tho she was inside her cage. i love dogs as a fact that they can apprehend humans better and can respond to commands faster but i agree that taking care of their needs will b more of a hassle as theyd need much attention that i might not b able to provide em with esp in the near future. theres stil so so much id need to learn first before i can decide on gettin one so i guess... flossy and the future 'porky' should make do for now :)

thats fluffy...

and this is babyflossy.. still havin 'fluffyphobia' <3

三个字

2008-09-29T03:02:00.000+08:00

我不屑!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-09-29T01:01:00.001+08:00

这生命过得也够辛苦的，不但要做个好女儿，好孙女，好妹妹，好姐姐，好朋友，好学生，好主人，好女友，好老婆，好妈妈还要做个好人。。。其实说到底，如他们其中一个对另一方有任何冲突而我只有一道选择的话，我宁愿对谁好呢?

baby flossy

2008-09-24T21:01:00.001+08:00

introducing my new baby; pork floss aka flossy (:

be good ooo^^

2008-09-22T03:07:00.003+08:00

明天要去探望兔宝宝了。。。等不及要快点把它带回家。有多个宝宝在家里陪我也是好的，总算多了个理由让我早点回家。

2008-09-22T01:09:00.001+08:00

2008-09-20T16:29:00.017+08:00

是弱者还是个失败者我已分不清楚，只知道这一喝下去我一定会醉。厌倦了，也不想再回到那些消耗酒精来逃避问题的日子了。可是比起今晚失眠却无心无力去做任何事而胡思乱想来得好吧。以为痛都痛过了，累都累坏了，心都麻了就什么都抛下了。原来我错了。。。我还在原地踏步。

มีอีกคำอยู่ข้างใน อยากให้เธอได้ยินว่าฉันรัก... เธอ...

2008-09-03T20:41:00.005+08:00

all the very best! (:

2008-08-28T00:37:00.001+08:00

the reality show today = recollections of 5 years back. hope ur fine now :D

expired draft.

2008-08-24T20:59:00.011+08:00

shouldnt have 'webbed tonight.

i know that ppl do go through changes but this just makes no damn sense to time. it takes one to impede this delay&retain process so if u havent sensed how determined i am this time round, yes im tellin you now... its rr final and that explained why i havent been answering and replying at all. ive said it all, even more than what ive expected myself to deliver to you. a quarter through the process and dun wish to reset everything to its rough initial.. so lets talk only when we both can see this as a totally platonic friendship.

P.S: THIS ENTRY IS JUST AN EXPIRED DRAFT. a scroll and found business

2008-08-23T07:06:00.002+08:00

i hope that
..i can start reading up today and
catch my sleep now cos ~~sappy and corny love songs~~ good songs should put me to sleep.

>>> listening to: jesse powell's

this is so irksome.
give my mind a break.

2008-08-21T08:49:00.000+08:00

its almost 9.. and im still all active and energetic from the strenuous evening of walking. i think i can forget about slpin today.

s t r a n g e

random in aug

2008-08-21T07:58:00.008+08:00

tracks running on my playlist for e week:

1) 911 - the day we find love

2) allure - last chance

3) azn dreamers - when you put your lips to mine
4) frankie j - gone
5) keith martin - i'll light the candle
6) leona lewis - better in time
7) leona lewis - yesterday

8) mariah carey - i stay in love
9) michael w smith - you are the love of my life
10) nick lachey - open your eyes

11) pinay - next time
12) rihanna - take a bow
13) the jonas bros - when you look me in the eyes

its just weird when all these songs seem to take control of my head and my emotional stability. its like these few verse alone could speak a thousand words...

currently playing:
air supply - goodbye.

moments im impressed of:

check out the slideshows of these 2 couples. kevin&ashley . william&clara.
hmm.

whats coming up:
biz law & principles of marketing and productions management papers next week !!

what im thinking of:
(the 202+hrs, the 44... ) when im gonna start reading up and...

what i wanna watch:
the moment of truth.

what im going to do next:
kick him once and get to slp before he starts snoozing agn.

2008-08-14T03:08:00.001+08:00

and to think im supposed to be all focused at this hr, rushing through my assignment thats due barely less than 6hrs later ~~(darl ure gonna nag at me if you read this)~~ but this whole things been weighing on my mind half of the day and the stupid incident this evening made me so restless and unmotivated.

p.s: i speak to you more than i speak to anyone else. and youre always the first and the safest place i turn to and confide in because you listen to me, and dont question. dear blog, yes you.

tues' bad cold

2008-08-14T02:32:00.002+08:00

how i wished that things could happen so differently and what happened yesterday were all just a nightmare cos i never felt so agitated, twinged and strained at the same time, just like a knife stabbing through my heart. but at the same time, i never felt any better cos ive let all my pending emotions and feelings surfaced for once cos you drove me to my desperation. dint know that im capable of this too cos this is the first time, and the last time i will be doing it i reckon. shouting and crying my eyes out like a crazy person that has lost her mind, as if grieving over a death, it was really hurting then and i had the urge to drink.. but not long after, the tears dried up.. and i hate it because each bad cry rewards me with a very bad cold. and now i realized that ever since i survived the long days of alcohol-cessation, i can no longer be as crazy as i was in the past. maybe in the first place, it wasnt even an addiction. it was just a die-hard-to-kick habit and a reliant when i wanna be alone. or mayb... its all because i understood that the hurt is finally over. so if i were to cry now, thats probably because everythings finally over and im back in my own world. and the last 3 words im gonna say is... "ITS THE END". cant afford to be so down and fragile because of you anymore. if theres one thing i would regret, that is bcos we let our words bring us down. but this only proves how frail the bond between us is. so id just take it as weve failed the test cos ive sorted out all my thinkings and had my final say ytd. and this shouldnt matter to me anymore. its been a long windy road and it aint easy to say let go then let go, but the dragging should end here. life still has to go on, no matter how hard it gets and yesterday's dispute has given me the courage and determination to move on... id treat yesterdays experience as having a very bad cold and its a speedy recovery. while there are going to be difficult times ahead, the very worst is over. i was trembling just then when i received my exam results slip thinking that im in a real deep shit because i know that i havent been putting enough effort into revising my work. and hell im really overjoyed because i managed to pass the modules, even tho the results wasnt exactly satisfactory, including the 2 that i know im bound to fail. i knw that God's giving me a chance, and *its time to help myself now...

*still lazy

'urban span.

2008-08-09T03:16:00.000+08:00

"just when it feels ure on a dead end road, theres always somewhere left to turn so dont give up now. ure so close to a brand new day"

and i want it to be over, i so want it to be through... and just when i thought i was done, you pull me in for another run. cant take this, wont take this, cant do this, wont do this... SO... ~~fuck~~ am gettin on with this life and fuck you anyway. ^^

shes never been the kind that ever let her feelings show and she thought that being strong meant never losing her self-control, that she could be sober enough to let go of her pain. to hell with her pride, let it fall like rain... its only a three a.m saturday night, the nights still young, the lights left on, and shes been lying on bed since two thirty with those songs blasted in her ears.. kicks off the covers and recalls about all the stupid happenings that seem to be just a dream and she typed em out. shes living in a world that wont stop pulling a trick on her.. cos one yesterday, everything was easy and shes living life like theres no tomorrow. and now the memories still remind her of how good things used to be, yesterday. and just the same old yesterday, she made a promise to herself that she never gonna be this way cos the only thing that she has ever known is to run.. that she kept on running faster and faster... but now, for the ?th of never, no more 'whatever'....... for the last time, shes gonna break the chain that binds her so shell finally be free. so please go fly. fly into the moon, fly as far as you can cos its a final goodbye i hope.

cherish (I)

2008-08-07T00:56:00.000+08:00

why does it always require a tragedy to take place before we urge ourselves to sober up and decide that its Really time to cherish e ppl ard us? we told ourselves time and time again that the past tragedy Should Be a lesson to be learnt and yet months gone by... and we're still the same old us, the selfish, ignorant, ungrateful, unconcerned, pampered and yet the unappreciative ones. id stay in bed and sleep through the day if those thoughts could go away. but reminders are everywhere.... and they haunt my mind... even when the night's still young. ive got lots of questions inside my mind i wonder who could ever enlighten me. this life's so unpredictable... and perhaps life's simply a FCUK. and the moment i read and perceived the text.. my mind went completely blank but im not sure why i just got the urge to hug you mum and tell you ilu. im all shaky at the thought of whats bound to come next.. dont want and cant afford to lose anyone of u so please take extra good care of yourselves cos if it was for anyone dearer to me, i'd really really lose my mind.............

and for now.......
NOW WHAT??!

july chapter

2008-07-27T23:35:00.003+08:00

一个故事的开始如果注定是悲剧，你还会演下去吗？难道真的只有痛才能证明爱的存在吗？那爱情到底是什么呢？不為了要什麼所以才給什麼。想说的太多一开口全都忘了。。。

today was pretty okay, i laughed and talked a lot. even if it was awkward for me whos always drunk and wandering about. i cry like a fool and tell myself i wun surrender, i swear and swear again... laughing and crying like a crazy person, i used to drink so much that i'll go crazy cos i know that alcohol puts me to bed. i cant think, think about those crazy days...... even when i had a lot of time to think. but now i figured out that in order for one to not lose anything, one must not believe anything. even tho the occurrence that took place the past few days may be a lil unpleasant, im glad that things seemed to be moving towards the right track.. been contemplating the pieces of advice i acquired from em and they actually turned out to be rather helpful in this recovery system, even the book deserved credits in this process. cos they say that even if i live, its not living. they say that even if i laugh,
its not laughing. they say i look shabby and it looks more like im crying while crying has become a bothersome for me now. but now is the new beginning, the tears ~~(have dried)~~ will dry and the sighs ~~(have been)~~ will be thrown away, i will wait for tomorrow cos its my time and soon i'll learn how to forget how to cry. and after i pass this troubled state, everything will be back to normal. im trying to let go of whats making me weary. i wanna be insane to not even feel it in my heart so dont take it out again... whatever will be, will be...

心冷是什么?
情是什么?
你是什么?

我不要再想了

我们都要告别过去，才能走向美好的未来。幸福起点，从新开始。向過去道别，跟未來說早安。明天的笑脸，幸福的起点。 (:

anw i went to check out this 'resort' wher *next week's bbq event is supposed to be held at .. and im pretty pleased with the place. hopefully im stil in time to get hold of it as all the other chalets and resorts are already fully-booked due to time constraint. and this is the last option....

u guys were probably wondering where this is... so i'd disclose the place ~~when~~ if everythings confirmed. (:

yesterday

2008-07-18T15:28:00.008+08:00

im beginning to curse this life. drained by these tears, fearful of this melody. broke down upon hearing that song and i fcking hate u for playing it cos the lyrics hit me so hard u knw it. so random, i was totally unprepared. im still askin myself if i regretted coming down that day and i loathe lookin at my reflection when im down cos my addiction reminds me that my soul's been twisted, torn, beat and encaged. i made things v clear that nite so dun ever ask me again cos i knw that i wun be able to hold back my emotions. im not calling for a second chance, im screaming at the top of my lungs.. never knew i would feel this pain that i dint even realized that i texted u before the sun rises telling u how miserable i felt Then that i dint wanna stay. the feeling's so unbearable its just too much for me to take.. so this is what they meant by living a hell. never intend to cry out how i felt but i guess.. i blurted it all Then. im frustrated by this life.. dont wanna live this way anymore. im a disappointment i knw and i hate myself for that too. help me make this make sense cos my brain's damaged... and even if i tucked myself into bed early i still couldnt get my sleep. and now i think... its just about ENOUGH. sorry for all the nutty things i did and for driving u guys out of e room when i was boozy that nite. the whole scene n even the lame scraps actually makes me realize that im lucky to have u guys ard. i knw i got completely crazy my senses' numbed i cant even feel the pain from all the blueblacks anymore. i guess i was tryin to clear some mental space. its a lil awkward that i keep saying that "it's nothing" when my heart's filled with stones but... even if i try to explain my feelings, the only true way to understand em would be to become me and feel em. so how do i fix this mess in my life? tell me pls cos everythin i do just doesnt seem right anymore. this is really killing me... uknw...

~~dear blog i only have the courage to turn to you~~

2008-07-15T04:25:00.001+08:00

undergoing a 3-days alcohol-cessation.
one last day to go.

blues.

2008-07-14T00:51:00.001+08:00

will the songs chase the pain away

for once i wished that these partial memory loss i suffer for those few hrs could be a permanent one cos im REALLY ~~getting~~ weary of facing life's trials .. dont wanna be reminded, dont wanna deal with anything, dont wanna think about anything, dont wanna care about anything.. thought i could be selfish enuf to shove everythin aside and redeem myself but why am i feeling this lousy... even the beers wouldnt spare me the agony. tried to stay away from it but agn and agn i let it take control of my head. know that im doomed since school's reopening and im definitely not in the least mood to lay my hands on the books. overindulging in alcohol, can they do drugs or better still, numb my senses for nuts. allergic to myself and getting sick of myself.. like a good girl gone bad. thought that beer could be my slpin pill, obtaining me a gdnite's slp n help me sleep thru the day but recently these hibernations' been unpleasant and i simply cant get back to sleep. gr i think im insane, nuts and everything that a loony could be.

past tense.

2008-07-07T04:14:00.000+08:00

;numb-ED.

really dont wanna deal with this... cooping myself in this lil chamber, im gonna start turning in earlier to keep my mind off things, till i finally get over this. i hope time's gonna be the best remedy and itll all get better in time.

you were the closest someone i ever had, the best gift ive ever received and im thankful for that.

my bambino.

2008-06-30T02:59:00.001+08:00

"shes only busy with her own stuffs as if im here everyday", he whimpered. and so he grabbed my hand, huge enough to hide his crying face. i heard him sigh and cry in his sleep tonight.

nothing seems to get into my head. im gg nuts...

aimless

2008-06-28T22:40:00.000+08:00

stoning with the book lying open on my bed, i just wanna close my eyes and get thru this day cos i woke up this noon feeling totally restless with this unsettled state of mind not knowing the exact reason why. too many questions racing thru my mind while nothing on the book gets to my brain. not in the mood to read. not in the mood to study. hate this.

walk outta it

2008-06-18T23:51:00.006+08:00

i wish...
that im stronger than a piece of ¢.
that im more than just a piece of ¢.

cos

im tired of playing this game.
and sick of re-living the pasts.
i hope the cars on the road werent too loud and you care enough to listen to all the things ive said word by word.
ive walked away so dont come back cos all youll hear from me is most probably "leave".

not hanging on

2008-06-14T17:17:00.001+08:00

confused with the tears,
i tie this dreadful knot and prepare myself for death.
cant stand this anymore.

i hang till this rope rots ........................................

just this once, pls dont question me why.
cos aft this hangover, im gonna cast ~~EVERYTHINGGGGGGG~~ this damn thing aside.

cp.

2008-05-08T03:01:00.010+08:00

想笑着附和说分开是好的。我舍不得可是时间回不去了。爱你很值得只是该停了。我们错过的错了就错了。

we both know that all these would eventually have to end someday.

and that 'someday'... was yesterday.

tee cham bpai laew gor yang mai laew gan bpai tee gor faa yang faa yoo din gor doo mai bpen-rai

youre the best thing that ever happened to me.

105D。

2008-03-26T00:12:00.007+08:00

the thin line between 'SHOULD I' and 'SHOULD I NOT'.
it needs extra courage and determination to allow ~~our~~ my intention become a decision.

;taxed ;drained

cant deny the fact that i aint that strong cos a peek at those messages still leaves me teary.
perhaps its time to change the tone of my calls.

no matter how hard i try not to, even if i get sick on lager and fall asleep, in the end i think about us again. even if i leaned into another person’s embrace, even if i do that, when i open my eyes in the morning i’m so alarmed seeing the phone, remembering that i might have called you while i was drunk last night.

if i were to ask myself one last question, it'd be that "Why does everyone else understand me but not you?".

;
厌倦了伤心流泪，有时候只是想让自己勇敢一点。太犹豫不绝总是折磨的起点 。如此放下是想让彼此都好过一些。或许离开才懂得相处。放手了并不代表我以不在乎而只想给彼此更好的选择让自己比较快乐一点。 过去的快乐满足和曾经付出过的一切一切我都会永远记在心里。

2008-03-02T17:28:00.000+08:00

letting go isnt as easy as it seems.

love is in the air...

2008-02-14T02:46:00.002+08:00

66D rain & shine.

a step-up to sharing life, side by side and day by day.

happy valentines day to all (:

walk out?

2008-02-09T02:15:00.000+08:00

when an intention of walking out once and for all strikes your mind for once...
when to work it out and when to walk away.

what mood

2008-02-03T02:59:00.000+08:00

not in the mood to blog, at all.

cos everything's not in my favour.
why is it that everytime i get too much hope, things ended up not working in my favor?
this is perhaps one of the hardest period of time i'll have to face this year.
mad or insane, bang my head. what the hell was i thinking??????????

and from whats happening, i know im at the losing end.
am i really preparing to lose everything or am i already losing everything?
seriously what does this life gonna mean to me now.. ya?
do i really deserve all these?

i cant seem to be concentrating on anything.........

give me one tight slap

2008-02-02T06:03:00.000+08:00

whatever that has happened this day...
how long is this phobia gonna stay with me for?

i guess im really outta my mind.

this gonna be the worst nightmare thats gonna haunt me every single day.
dont ask me what has happened and just stand by me alright...

mid jan blues

2008-01-16T05:32:00.000+08:00

i started off this year with a quarter-full inbox in my cell that i grasp tight on my hand and its now the 3rd week of 2008... i hope the rain's gonna wash away all the bad things real soon.

to those people who've always been there for me be it morally, emotionally or physically, who's always showering me with unconditional love and concern... i may not have expressed it but i really do appreciate em, esp those who are still there for me despite the nuisance i may have been whenever im boozed up.

"sen, i think you'll feel dehydrated so drink more water. anyway, just 2 cents of my worth.. it's normal for people to turn to alcohol to drown their sorrows. u did and i did too. alcohol numb the senses but it doesnt solve the problem. i may not know the reason why you're sad. perhaps ------ is a part of it. but no matter what the reason is, there have to be a time for you to stand up again. the faster, the better. only you can help yourself, no matter what the problem is. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ i may not be the best person for you to talk to neither am i a good listener, but if you ever need anyone to talk to, you can find me ya. and you dont ever need to feel ashamed in front of me, -- or even ----. we also have our own weaknesses and perhaps we have even embarassed ourselves worse before."

i may not be good at words and lets my pride get in the way at all times but deep within me theres more to what i wish to express. i really need this generous acceptation n understanding. sometimes i may not say a thing because im far TOO capable of holding back my words and stuff but deep within me i know that im worrying and questioning myself a little too much, it makes my head and heart aches.. but on the other hand, it'd only prove myself something... that is, i do care...

a brand new chapter of our lives is about to unfold... lets keep this year a smiley one alright. (:
lets do less drinks and give ourselves one lesser excuse to be tipsy about. we cant be drinking our moonlights away

happy 2008!

2008-01-02T04:20:00.000+08:00

without realizing, xmas has passed and a brand new year 2008 is here.. i used to whine alot about how unfairly 2007 has been treating me but truth to be told, ive earned many many sweet memories and great companions throughout the year as well.

just a mini recollection of some of the gloomy days that i went through in the yr2007:
-that particular month that i have the urge to drink ~~because of someone~~ in the early part of the year.
-the sudden rough patch our family have to go through in sept and the nightmares i have to bear with within this period of time was tormenting but glad that im recovering really fast.
-the few days of 'quarantine' period and the little 'accusation' i have to put up with in early dec.
-and now, my school stuffs that ive yet to settle. (hopefully i'll see a silver lightning really soon)

i've lost many good things in between but i believe that i've gained better ones instead. to give it a fair credit, the good to bad was a ratio of 60:40. maybe i should stop complaining and accept the fact that this is life... things happened, with or without our intention of accepting it and i can only hope that 2008 will be a better year. whatever thats happened, its all in the heart. some things are yet to be solved but nevertheless, a happy new year to all of us! a new beginning, lets spread the love.. (:

*talking about it, my left eye's been twitching non-stop since just now. is it a bad sign or am i thinking too much?

2007-12-28T01:35:00.000+08:00

i used to think that people who resorted to alcohol to forget things are plainly fools, but who'd ever imagine that im doing that too... maybe a little too much, a little over and true enough, it only makes your head spins, makes your muscle cramp, makes you tear and yet everything still remains unchanged the very next day youre sober. its dumb and moronic WE ALL KNOW... but it now seems to be my SUITtest drug. and i hate it cos my lifestyle has contradicted my principles.

if i have to cry this time, i hope the only reason will be because the time is passing too fast.

2007-12-23T02:08:00.000+08:00

why am i always so weak?????????????????????
so weak to the extent that i feel like a LOSER sometimes.
just another 4 more days.. 4 more days and i'd be facing all the SHITS.

what ~~should~~ can i do now? sit back and receive the death penalty in silence? just kill me with some booze ya?

race against time

2007-12-21T04:39:00.000+08:00

why do i have to race against time as if im running out of time?
i @!#$%^& hate 2007 yet im afraid to hear the clock ticking away, welcoming the jan blues..
i'd have to give this game away eventually... and what consequences would i have to face?
is my luck really down or is this a trial to the situation im bound to face subsequently?

messy mind (I)

2007-12-18T02:34:00.000+08:00

i realized myself beginning to dread being in this little blog.spot cos its semi-littered with all the stupid mixed-up, unclear emotions.

so i aint that blessed afterall ya, with all the recent probs piling up one after another. too many unacknowledged lies in discreet silence.. dont want my life to change for good but is it still possible? you bet

2007-12-10T04:46:00.000+08:00

condemned.
what explanations can i give to rid myself off that identity without making matters worse for all of us? have i only got a choice? to keep mum and swallow them all...? mum you really gotta trust me. God, i'd really need extra luck to get me through this lap bcos i'll never be ready to face the consequences if anything were to retrogress.

dont i even have a stand to quibble?
feel so wronged.

if i'm still the same old me

2007-12-04T04:54:00.000+08:00

its like dear diary, you wont even know who am i anymore.
ever since i wasnt writing to you... my mind's in a kind of whirl.
i typed 913847 words, read em over and ended up saving em as drafts.
my draftbox' overflowing...

so many words left unsaid, and theres so many things words wont be able to justify the truth
remembering that i could still write to you like this, even if you wouldnt get it right away...

you ~~might~~ are bound to get the wrong idea
you ~~might~~ are bound to question me

but really really,
please trust me that i won't go overboard

*i still keep bits and pieces of my old me inside of me

2007-11-15T06:06:00.000+08:00

cos each time i listen to the song,
i knew it in my heart that ive yet to find a way to walk away completely.

take care

2007-11-06T03:15:00.000+08:00

ve been hounded by the same series of nightmares for the past few days and its makin me weak Agn..
hopefully my intuition isnt right this time
bcos i dont feel Quite right for nuts.......

ive got a hunch that ...................
my sixth sense's gonna be unquestionably accurate this time round....
these dreams serve a purpose right?

i thought im recovering pretty well...
but then i realized that ive yet to put It behind me..
the memory's stil vivid in my mind and i wanna have it all erased Totally.
Help Me!

hopefully being away for the few days wouldnt reset everythin to its startin point.

take care.

standing by

2007-10-23T03:14:00.000+08:00

since when did i learn to hold on?
since when did i learn to hang around?
since when did i learn to standby?
since when??
since when??

ive realized it only lately,
and the answer is so indefinite.

dont wanna be in this, but i guess..... im already in the game.

你越弹错，
我越笑得起来 (:

its the way (:

2007-10-09T04:08:00.000+08:00

maybe its the way that i get nervous when youre ard... its in the way that you move me and the way that you tease me, the way that i want you tonight.. its in the way that you hold me and the way that you know me and when i cant find the right words to say, you feel it in the way. theres something bout how you stay on my mind, theres something bout the way that i whisper your name when im asleep... maybe its the look you get in your eyes, oh baby its the way that it makes me feel to see you smile... and the reasons they may change.. but what im feeling stays the same. i cant put my fingers on just what it is that makes me love you... you know, baby.. so dont ask me to describe, I get all choked up inside just thinking bout the way...............

theres nothing more to say than I feel it in the way...

*just a song which has been rhyming in my head for the whole evenin. (:

2007-10-08T04:48:00.000+08:00

maybe its time to give your loved ones a hug.

A

BIG
FAT
HUGGG
(:

yayy. i finally got hold of the steering wheel agn tonight. (:(: was thrilling, as well as hair-raising at the same time. been 8 months since i last did any driving, so skills are kinda rusty i knw. riding down from alexandra road to depot road... was a total blast. the distance was rather bounded, but it made my day (: we bunch of potential yet still-currently-illegal drivers, took turns to drive down from ikea@alexandra to holland v(where all the white beetles can be spotted) for dinner.

and after half an hour of grab-a-lot hunting, we finally settled down at this mexican eatery located just beside nydc, el patio.

whats great about this place is that we may scribble on their table while waiting for our dishes to be served.. just like this...

and this is the proper way of eating roll ups fajitas...

... and theres free flow of chips too. good luck getting a sore throat (:

*i SO wanna be stepping on the gas pedals soon......

say bye to goodbyes

2007-10-05T01:57:00.000+08:00

now each goodbye makes me feel... shivery, uneasy and wrecked.

life used to be so good. mayb just too good to be true

2007-10-02T01:30:00.000+08:00

just when u thought u had it all... things just had to end.
just like what my instinct tells me, things happened.
now its all in the heart...

life's changed.. for the worse.

i dont wanna act like a spoilt brat, or take advantage of the situation to win other people's concern.. but i cant delude myself, that im perfectly fine at this point of time. i Really wanna move on. i dont know what to do Then, thought i should be alone for awhile.. but then i realized that i needed someone to be there for me more than ever. i had this fear inside of me i just cant get rid of. im afraid to be alone now.. not even in the morning, not even when its all bright. i gotta need someone to bother me now and then, to keep my mind preoccupied 24/7, to stop my mind from wandering and wondering. im dead tired, yet i cant sleep. i Dont dare to sleep, even when the lights' all on. im Sick of this. i cant be clinging on to just anyone 24/7.. theyve got better things to do. and i..... still have my pride.. that pride which gets in my way all the time

this cant drag on any longer. i need my life back.. i wanna be set back to the crazy mode

when a chain of bad things happen in a row, u just cant stop thinking of whats life gonna be, whether this life's worth living Anymore. things are gonna be tough, and im afraid to face em. ive never been more certain about things. all the horrid, evil and disheartening events have been taking place this year. im complaining......... but does that help?? things shouldnt b moving towards this route. i dont feel good about things. theres still 3 more months to go before this year comes to a close. WHATS NEXT???? i can go berserk just thinking about it. I'M FREAKING OUT

i cant believe that this Gonna be a lesson ive to learn to urge myself to cherish the people around me cos it seems that im becoming more reliant and dependent on people instead

that DAD.. is my DAD

2007-09-17T05:15:00.000+08:00

the reason why im blogging right now is because... my dad's in town.

it gotta mean that....

1) stow away those alcoholic drinks from his sight

2) no more spending my nights on the sofa

3) keep a low profile when using the phone (else he gotta start buzzing all the '?s' like what, when, where, WHO)

4) find an extremely logical and wise reason for leaving the house

5) sleep early, wake up early. (ok this is Really for our own good)

6) continuous probing of all the 'what time's...

(REMARK #1 DELETED)

just like my mum says about the flying kite theory.. 'focus on how much is enough and how much is too much'

(REMARK #2 DELETED)

the 1109 victims, our lesson

2007-09-11T05:20:00.000+08:00

without realizing, 6 yrs had passed.
do take a few seconds to commemorate the sept-11 victims.

THINK. PONDER. VISUALIZE. UNDERSTAND.

compared to the victims' family members who are Still around, we are extremely blessed and favored.
they struggled to stay alive, without having their loved ones by their side.

yet some of us(includes me) who own a complete family, aint cherishin what we have. but rather, take them for granted.
do not wait until you lose em before you finally realize that they are a part of your life.
its time to do some reflection.
time to set our priorities right.
life's short, we never know when we are gonna be separated by distance.
our parents, our grands, our family members, our friends and all our loved ones;
we gotta maintain good ties with one another while its still possible.
treasure them like today's the last day of your life.

rather than spending your time pondering how to add years to our/their life,
use the time to treat em right, to treat em better, to make em feel loved, and to make em feel impt.
yes its easy to say but hard to do.

im afraid to imagine what im bound to face in time to come, yet im not doing anythin to re-shape the situation.
truth is, we're not the helpless ones, but the unconcerned ones.

i hate to appear so vulnerable and frail,
but im sure the fact that this year's been a rather tragic year made us go weak on our knees.
accidents, illnesses, diseases.. a jumble of grievous happenings constantly took place
on the media, and everywher around us.

im a loser when it comes to expressing concern, love and stuff, but it doesnt mean that i dont appreciate em.
it gave me the cold creeps each time i thought of doin that, it feels so unseemly

im afraid to face the rough days ahead.
but life still has to move on.
i dont wanna end up cryin over my regrets, cos i know that it doesnt alleviate the pain.
some regrets can never be mend.

give me a little love.
make me feel loved.

hand in hand, love is sent

7 reasons to a stinging morning

2007-08-23T23:15:00.000+08:00

'You' are rated an 'A+' for being the biggest turnoff in the early morning.
yet ive found excuses to disqualify 'You'.
aint i nice?

#1 MY alarm clock.
ok i dont blame you, cos im the one who set you on.

#2 others' alarm clocks.
please kindly put that alarm clock or whatever alarm-related device beside you and shut it off once it rings. if possible, dont let it snooze so much (:

#3 vacuum cleaners.
yes we appreciate the effort youre putting in to actually rid the dusts off the house but please be sweet enough to work only when everyone's awake.

#4 misty weather.
since we're not in control of the weather, i should comment no more.

#5 ringing of the house phone.
plainly because.. i detest picking up house calls. especially having to open up my ear to that ringer tone, is kinda disaster for me. well i wun grumble if you ring my cellphone. just a matter of me missing the call or rejecting it unintentionally.

#6 obviously, any bad news.
but we're the helpless ones regarding this issue. so i shan't make noise. the earlier we know it, the better it is for us right?

#7 'drillman'.
no youre unforgiven. i almost used up all my vulgarities in silence. fcktard? as much as i need the house back in complete perfect condition, can you Please choose a better time to do that?? at least dont fckin drill in the mornin as if everyone's gone for work, or better still, everyone's deaf. be considerate. youre not only affectin us, but also the residents stayin in #08- and #10-. more over, im on exam leave. be a lil courteous, i'd really appreciate that. im nice enough to actually blast the music to my ears and Try to go back to sleep. but obviously, to no avail. would you be a lil nicer to this sleepyass and continue the drilling job later? million thanks Lah dude.

and Yes drillman, congrats! youre the champion for this section.

sooooooooo yesterday - emily affair

2007-08-02T03:05:00.000+08:00

SO ive just turned nine-TEEN on tues,
and im now suffering from the SO-YESTERDAY disorder.

~~i wished that it'd be my birthday everyday, then i can be treated like a lil queen~~
~~who wouldnt be blamed for any mistakes ive done :D~~
~~who'd be cared for, loved and be given in all the time~~
~~but yes my birthday's over and i knw that i aint gonna be the priority anymore :(~~

a day has passed,
you can now stop reminding me about my last year being a teenager.

i knw it so well, that i aint young anymore and that its now the right time for me to make plans for the future and find a goal in life.

my instinct tells me that ~~my birthday~~ this year isnt gonna be an easy year and the thought of it Haunts me. But i aint gonna think too much...........

last nite's blow-candle session(the relighting ORDINARY-candle) made it possible for me to make quite a number of wishes. but i aint that greedy, i'll be more than satisfied just to have my first 3 wishes granted. and for this moment, yes grandpa you gotta get well soon.

anw, here's some pics of last nite's celebration over at wild rocket followed by w.o bar..

W.O after dinner

strawberry cheesecake shot romance

last nite was simple yet Sweet.

enjoyed myself pretty much (esp. during the pang ping pong game), thanks guys (:

#20072007

2007-07-23T00:38:00.000+08:00

time flies..
FRIDAY the 20072007 has just passed;

CHURCHES & CHAPELS fully-loaded with wedding couples,
BALLROOMS occupied by acquaintances and relatives,
and even the stretch along sentosa's glittered with smiling faces of the brides and the grooms

~~everyone seems to be settling down,~~ ~~whens my turn?~~

it was the topic of the talk over coffee today

and without realizing, another brand new monday is already here

anw im finally sleeping on my bed agn tonight
im sure im gonna snooze my alarm clock tmr morning
oh no

2007-07-20T05:10:00.000+08:00

OVERLY sober
.kill me

I HATE ENTITLING ENTRIES #2

2007-07-14T01:24:00.000+08:00

the sudden invader to my Almost Flawless complexion (*coughs) are these countless SUPER VISIBLE nasty 'brats' thats clustered tog on my forehead. definitely Getting in My Way. yknw how f irritating it can get especially when all sorts of treatments youve seek just doesnt seem to be productive atall but rather, leaving more 'Flakes' behind. grrr. sometimes it just makes you go crazy ella ella eh eh eh tell me how to fight pimples and squeeze the stupid acnes outta my forehead without leaving any scars behind?? believe it or not, ive yet to go for my first Facial. cant imagine the freaking needles poking my forehead Ha

sometimes it just makes me wonder how those 'brats' rolled in.

1) TOO BRIEF cleansing?
2) dirty pair of hands swiping against my forehead??
3) long feelers??
4) late nights??
5) perspiration?
6) excessive chocolates? (but i hardly have one)
7) cigarette smoke???

OK, let's just blame it on the bad weather!

ANW we watched harry potter on thurs night. got the tix like 4days back but wasnt sure if i should watch it. but well we Finally decided to watch it only after the movie has started for like 15mins? So we made our Wacky way down to the cathay, got our bites and got to our seats by 9.45. frankly the movie was only a SO-SO for me, reason being is simply because... "I MUST NOT TELL LIES" im never a die-hard-fan of harry (:

enjoy the show, people!

random post #2

2007-06-16T03:51:00.000+08:00

at times stoning doesnt only incite yawnings, but also gets us engaged in our private history.
its just like the casette rewinding <<<<<<
everything replayed clean and clear,
and it sometimes made us think back of all the silly past and silly things we did.
it makes us smile it makes us laugh it makes us cry.
laugh off the jokes thats not meant to be just a joke,
and cry off those pain-in-the-ass pathetic lil happenings thats happened
and tell yourself that you gonna be fine after a good cry.

at times silence may be intimidating, but it somehow gets on our nerves when noise starts polluting (esp. when we're really down and needed some quiet time by ourself),
its not only deafening, but also irritating multiplied by a Zillion.
it just occurs to you (at that point of time) how ignorant (yea) and selfish human can be (including me).

at times it takes ages just to acquire one simple answer (eg. yes or no)
but sometimes the weigh of importance of the question and the impact it has on things does really matter, thus explaining the long wait.
theres always these 2 options: to hang around or to walk off.
you wait, because you know its worth the wait.
or just storm out because you know it best, its your forte.

at times we say words that we dont mean,
and hurt people indirectly or accidentally,
but at many point of time, we feel the hurt too.
words never come easy, and when it comes, it doesnt go easy too.

have you ever wondered,
how good will this life be for all of us
if those sorry crummy 'at times' doesnt take place
and everyone of us play our part and consider the consequences of our actions before carrying em out?

its worth a serious thought.
for the better of me and you..

loves (I)

2007-06-09T05:48:00.000+08:00

decided to upload some of the NOT-SO-RECENT pics of my lovely adorable baby bro since i'd finally get to see him in barely less than 12hrs time! how much weight did you put on this round? HA here comes the sentosa date; your long-waited cable car & now throwing in bonus of a trip to underwaterworld & a peck on the pink dolphins' cheeks. bet youre sd excited to be able to sleep tonight kev. so many pleasant things await you (:

hope ludos wont make you 'rain' anymore :D

the PRO & CONS in life

2007-06-07T05:01:00.000+08:00

At times...
we know hatred does exists,
but rather let them go by.

Many times...
ignorance led to peace
then to a handshake.

1/2 of the times...
we know we care,
but chose to leave words unspoken.

Most of the times...
unspoken words led to a misunderstanding,
then to an eternal regret.

Sometimes...
it's not only the approach you use
NOR
the different perspectives you look at things that matters,
but rather, the tricks that fate plays on you.

think(I)

2007-05-30T04:44:00.000+08:00

"don't let your heart rule your head"; i let my head rule my heart.
& when music takes control of your emotions, any idea why?

leave it

2007-05-29T03:41:00.000+08:00

its not one last cry, but one last try.

when your voice travels through your own ear

2007-05-28T05:32:00.000+08:00

i heard the echo of my own voice.
i realized that i was talking to myself all the while

open your eyes wide

2007-05-27T05:40:00.000+08:00

people claim that time never waits for man. like what they say... cherish what you've got because you'll never know when you'll lose them for good. be it your family members, friends or soul mate.. where love's concerned, theres definitely gonna be some sacrifices made. "you reap what you sow". and the first step is to be truthful to yourself because chances dont come easily. guess what... i caught my clock going backwards today. so what does it allude to? that we can turn back time? or that the impossible can be made possible? or would you rather say "your eyes are playing tricks on you"? when your clock stops ticking.. the world still moves on *with or without you

get your brain thinking

2007-05-26T07:29:00.000+08:00

its comical how things started off sweet and ended up with a bitter conclusion.

its amusing how bad beginnings could lead to happy endings.

its silly how people could say that "good beginnings make good endings"..

but it sounds wacky to hear people say that "good endings make good beginnings".

well perhaps all of us have tried or i should say, experienced this "STEPPING OUT" journey in life.

but who actually really agrees that every "good endings make good beginnings"??

take into consideration the difference between a good ending and a better ending.

seriously is there any better things in store for us to look forward to?

i questioned. ??!?!

and agn, do we draw our own dreams or do we design them?

beautiful dreams are hard to retain. and the worst nightmares linger and haunt you nights.

have you ever been lost in dreams?

have you ever dreamt of something you hoped it could happen for real?

have you ever tried finding means and ways to convince yourself that you weren't dreaming?

if you pinched yourself twice and felt the slight pain, what does it imply?? that you were sober and aint dreaming?

dreams make us go "I wish.." for 5 seconds and then make us fall right back asleep.

whatever it is, enough said. *sweet dreams

random post #1

2007-05-16T02:49:00.001+08:00

just-some-random-post.

concerning what crowds think is COOL,

yet seemed more of a Fool rather than Cool to me (:
.

do you think drinking is cool?

do you think puffing on cigarettes is cool?

do you think ecstasy is cool?
.

well i'm referring to...

people who's drinking only to prove their ability to hold their liquor well..

people who's smoking only to brag about how manly they are..

& people who's consuming drugs only to prove to their fellow peers how bold they are..
.

no offence but seriously... take a minute to think about it. IS IT WORTH THE RISK??

mummy's day!

2007-05-13T17:37:00.000+08:00

it's 13MAY! which indicates that... it's MOTHER'S DAY

anw we celebrated mum's belated birthday when she came down on mon @ pan pac hai tien lo

dress code: formal; and guess what? i was quite persistent of getting there in my gym shorts initially loll..

they were yummy and appetizing
and she's got the ferrero rocher-based birthday cake [: [:

MUM'S SATISFACTION: (hopefully ha)
.

& my first attempt at making senna's very own handmade mother's day card. hopefully it doesnt turn out too bad =D

it may seem a lil kinda random, out-dated, kiddy and stuff making a DIY mum's day card but 's my only way of expressing the words i guess i'd never have the courage to tell her face to face. just to add on to the quite-sweet-pleasant corny words ive written on the card (i guess i'd never wanna read em twice), forgive me for being rude and selfish at times. for trying to walk off in between our arguments, for making your blood boil and all. sry if ive made you worried and sad but truly i do appreciate every little things you've done for me, for the neverending sacrifice, for never walking out on me, and for understanding me. thanks mummy
happy mother's day [:

the betrayal and the betrayed

2007-05-05T07:36:00.000+08:00

its never advantageous to be too readily influenced by other people's words and to trust someone easily. 's never been facile to find someone whom you love, and loves you back. but its never been any harder to find someone whom you click off well, yet loves you more than you do love him. imagine getting to know that you ended a perfectly cool love-filled and no-conflicts relationship over some untrue words of someone whom you actually regard as a good friend of yours. you stayed home thinking why why why would you fall for someone like him, why would you pick him out of all the guys and etc etc. and after two long years... the truth finally came to light. so its your so-called friend who's behind this all this while.. telling you all the cheezy, shabby and sleazy stuffs about him, and you actually buy the story without much thought. and i guess nothing beats the pain of learning that your 'friend' actually had interest in him back then and was bent on separating you guys. how do you feel? like the whole world's toppling upon you? when that hurt is realized, it is flashed back to the FOOLISH multiplied by ten million. but added is GUILT, to your beloved one. love is there, known only to the Foolish with the regret. not seen by the Betrayed, as the haze of pain and hurt interferes.

mum's day!!

2007-04-29T23:55:00.000+08:00

well was actually quite lazy to get my fingers working.. but since its a special occasion today.. its necessary to blog? ha yea its my mum's big day today.. so happy birthday mummy! since she isn't here... lets make the 3pages of 623characters sms be my bday gift for her. loll she can read it over and over agn for pleasure and consolation purposes. hahah thats killing 2 birds with one stone! ha nah jus kidding, well let that comfort her for the moment. hahaha but seriously we still have no idea of what to give her, just yet. still trying to think of something a lil more special and close to the heart...... but what can that be?? brr

phat is beautiful (:

2007-04-28T05:27:00.000+08:00

have you ever wondered how heavy pounds are? 1 pound is equivalent to 0.45359 kg. and now lets take out our calculators and calculate how heavy 200 pounds exactly are? hmm its approximately 90.718kg.. well slightly chunky but its not exactly a minus sign. These days many girls are concerned about being fat.. but frankly.. which girls aren't? and I believe theres more to just the weight? but again, never ever apologise for your size! "love is not measured by your weight, but by the weight of his love for you"

yea this is the movie we watched today... a korean movie "200 Pounds Beauty". uh finally!!! have been waiting since the last 741214566sunsets to catch it. was hilarious and heart-rending.. (: do spare 1.75hrs of ya time to watch it, real good.. make you laugh out loud. but do rmb to shut ...x at the right time lest you get a spanking from the other audiences ha

"FATS DON'T MAKE YOU FAT" lol

ice cream fever!

2007-04-23T03:05:00.000+08:00

heres what we are all craving for...

lets have a peek at the ice cream tees...

and save the best for the last...

the cute ice cream shoes and dunks (:
heres some of my fave flavours:

a lil kiddy but its really cool to have the whole collection of em. theres large variety of flavas!

and for a more formal presentation wise, i shall recommend you guys this flava...

simple, cool and doesn't get out of style (:

and my all time fave is....

love their chubby-boxing-glove-like tongue (:

so whats your flava?

senna's jukebox (A)

2007-04-15T06:43:00.000+08:00

MY PLAYLIST

1) Say Goodbye

spaz: "my ex used to sing this song to me all the time and told me he'd never say goodbye. and that was true... I was the one to say goodbye."

2) 6 Months, 8 Days, 12 Hours

rb: "i can relate to the meaning of this song..."
ch: "this is the best song u can relate to when u just can't let that someone go when u tried to.."

3) I Can't Sleep

mp: "damn this reminds me of my boo, i miss you & im sorry for what i said"

4) One Better

doc: "i can be more than u will ever need"

5) It Only Reminds Me Of You

cha: "each time i hear this song, it reminds me of something, someone i had to let go of. everything reminded me of him.. he is someone else's now.."

interior

2007-04-01T03:11:00.000+08:00

it was already some time back ever since i was stucked with all the brochures and pamphlets i got from those schools i visited, yet this minute i started doubting once AGAIN if my decision of eliminating interior design from my long list of "my future lies beneath" was right.

" most interior designers focused on decorating: choosing a style and color palette and then selecting appropriate furniture, floor and window coverings, artwork, and lighting. However, an increasing number of designers are becoming more involved in designing architectural detailing, such as planning layouts of buildings undergoing renovation, including helping to determine the location of windows, stairways, escalators, and walkways. Interior designers must be able to read blueprints, understand building and fire codes, and know how to make the space accessible to the disabled. Designers frequently collaborate with architects, electricians, and building contractors to ensure that their designs are safe and meet construction requirements. "

well i just hope i wouldnt regret my decision in the near future...

its quite accurate..

2007-03-30T03:23:00.000+08:00

try http://dna.imagini.net/friends/ i think its quite accurate lol you guys should try it.

"Here's how your choices compare to others..."

My art - 4%
My music - 12%
My treat - 8%
My landscape - 29%
My freedom - 6%
My love - 8%
My gross - 7%
My like to do - 5%
My exciting free time - 8%
My holiday - 6%
My vice - 7%
My bedroom - 10%
My drink - 8%

imagine those percentages in bold are the lowest in percentage for that category. sheesh i dont think im such a weirdo to pick all those 'unwanted' choices? lol. ok i understand that perhaps people from different countries dont think alike. hmm anw this is the results for my visualDNA...

1) PERSONALITY: Moods
You're a bit of a romantic and have a taste for the exotic. You love feeling the sea breeze in your hair, sun on your skin... Slip those shoes off... You like to kick back. When it comes to art, you're creative yourself, and you believe in self-expression. You can see the little masterpieces in everyday life - you can be a touch sentimental. As for music, it's the soundtrack to your world. It gives you focus, and concentration - you might find it hard to switch off. Your choice of treat reveals an indulgent side to you. A real food lover, you like to have all of your cake.
MOOD: Easy Rider

2) PERSONALITY: Fun
You're a bit of a workaholic. You can't help pushing yourself to the limit and can't find that off switch. For kicks, you like to experience life at full volume with the lights on full. You're extremely passionate and emotional, and a bit of an exhibitionist? You express yourself and don't mind who's watching. When it comes to holidays, you reckon they should always be indulgent - a very special treat. You love to be in charge of where you are heading - the freedom of choosing your own direction. What grosses you out? You like things to be clean, neat and smelling sweet - that's not too much to ask... is it?
FUN: Thrill

3) PERSONALITY: Habits
Living in a material world you are always flashing the plastic. You like to live for today and not get caught up thinking about tomorrow - hey, that would slow your shopping down. Your choice of drink reflects your love of the stability and comfort of routine. As for the home, you have very cool and contemporary taste. It's not just about function - your environment has to be as stylish as you are.
HABITS: Back to Basics

4) PERSONALITY: Love
You're a real home soul. You care deeply about family life and all that comes with it, the love between a parent and a child is so special. When you think of freedom - you think of the opportunity of the city. Big enough to house all your ambitions, where people can be whoever they want.
LOVE: Home Soul

listen

2007-03-21T02:09:00.000+08:00

Linda's...

" 那难以忘怀的电影 还感动我的原因 原来和自已伤心的爱情那么接近我们的过去 想要忘记不容易提醒自已却更不清醒控制不了记忆迟早有一天我会忘记你我总是这样安慰我自已爱总是要面对结局我只是太爱你迟早有一天我会想起你不要你同情不要你担心会有别的爱走进生命那首抒情的歌曲 成为我的心情 原来爱情最后的目的只够了解自已我们的过去交给时间去忘记我很高兴曾认真爱你没有辜负自已 "

its true

2007-03-19T04:57:00.000+08:00

If you've ever had a broken heart, you promise yourself to never let it happen again. Don't wanna think about it, don't wanna dream about it, but it finds its way back into your head. The " I love you's', I need you's' " are only words that people say. They're just words, when they're hand in hand. Days may pass.. But true love lingers. Be cool about it, be true to yourself, you'll get the answer..